the rest is silence

Terri Schaivo
December 3, 1963 – February 25, 1990

cold hearted fucker

well…

it should all be over now, but it isn’t. the fucker in this case is of course me. I was all but called this at work today when I mentioned that I felt that the parents in this case were out of line. I have been very vocal about my opinion of the schindlers and the company they have kept in recent months. I had hoped, and my hope was rewarded, that michael schaivo would bar the schindlers from the funeral. they have acted atrociously.

I am areligious, I don’t believe in good or evil, right or wrong, or even in a soul. but, I have lived in this country long enough to pick up a few things, and one of those things that has always been very prevalent is that the body is a shell for the soul and that death is not something to be fear or dreaded. when the faithful die, their soul ascends to heaven and wicked fall to hell.

wherever Terri was headed she arrived more than fifteen years ago, and what has been fed in florida ever since was nothing of the Terri that her friends and family knew.

if the soul does exist, I cannot believe that god would want it to be trapped in a body that does not now and will not again function.

however, if that is what god wants, truly wants, then once again fuck god.

more war crimes

once again our soldiers are demonstrating their lack of training. someone forgot to teach this dumb fuck the difference between combat casualty and murder victim.

for clarity I do know the difference. the army should not, and for the most part does not, kill civilians, the wounded, or anyone else not armed. I was once able to say we also don’t invade sovereign countries, but it’s been years since I could. we have lost our reputation, and we will not soon get it back.

I really hate what the republicans and wussy democrats have done to my country.

we are all damned.

can we keep this... between us? I'd hate to lose my teaching job...

this week actually starts the long term Boy&Horse movie festival, and with the help of the alamo drafthouse and tinseltown I’m going to see about two dozen movies over the next couple of month, most of which I couldn’t watch in the theaters on their first run. either by age or just out of rarity I’ve missed a lot of movies in their native element.

the first such movie, which I saw last night, was Weird Science. here’s a movie, part of the shermer legacy, that I had never seen in wide screen, I’d not even held a copy of the dvd and the only vhs version was a bootleg taped off hbo more than a decade ago. so as beginnings go this was a good one. not that I really need to, but I will have a review of Weird Science posted by monday on my movie site. and this time, I mean it…

the rest, so far, are as follows:

School of the Holy Beast, midnight on 04/16/2005
Best of Bollywood: Don, 6pm on 04/16/2005
Secret of NIMH, 7pm on 04/18/2005
The Sinus Show: Travoltathon, quarter to ten on 04/22/2005
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, midnight 04/23/2005
The Films of Kim Jung Il: Pulgasari, 7pm on 04/25/2005
Cloak and Dagger, noon on 04/30/2005
The Forbidden Zone, quarter to ten on 04/30/2005
Princess Bride, 7pm on 05/08/2005
Inside Deep Throat, 7pm on 05/10/2005
Steamboy, quarter to ten on 05/10/2005
Dark Side of the Rainbow, quarter to ten on 05/17/2005
Metropolis with live music, 7pm on 05/27/2005
For Your Height Only, quarter to ten on 05/29/2005

some crazy, some essential, and some just for the hell of it

tell me. and remember, this is for posterity, so... be honest. how do you feel?

so when I was scoping out the drafthouse site checking show prices I stumbled on a little link to an online quiz.

what Princess Bride character are you?









Which Princess Bride Character are You?
this quiz was made by mysti

I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies

destination: not canada

turns out canada is not the all inclusive destination for the peace loving warriors of america.

not that this has anything to do with the thinking civilian world, as long as no draft is in place no one is going to be forced against their will to fight in iraq.

as has been said before: you cannot agree to join the army if you have a true moral objection to killing.

so you know what, hinzman, you’re a deserter, a criminal and a scoundrel.

and another thing, I hear that france is a good place to escape american justice.

coming to a street near you

the us army has once again missed their monthly recruiting goal, prompting a change in strategy, well not really.

their new strategy is to put more recruiters on the streets hassling young, underemployed minorities into joining. stop-loss will also become the norm, but that wasn’t in the article. that was just something I guessed at, and if fox news can guess and get away with it so can I.

well, actually fox lies.

checks and balances, still in place ever under W

the supreme court denied the appeal of Terri Schiavo’s parents.

this of course is the only outcome that makes sense and was therefore completely unexpected. although the last time I checked the msnbc.com poll on this case is still running 69% in favor of the husband. money it seems can buy you a law, but it won’t make that law constitutional.

and 90% of people responding believe the politicians are pressing their own agendas, go figure.

austin insights by Boy&Horse

I don’t do drugs…

okay, so… I don’t do drugs, not that I’m against their use, I just don’t dig on them.

so there are things you can tell by looking at me, one I’m a little chubby. I’m comfortable enough to admit that, so it’s obvious I don’t shoot heroine. I have meat on my bones, so I got that going for me.

second, I’m not cool so I don’t snort cocaine, or I don’t snort cocaine so I’m not cool. I’ve never been to clear on the order of that one. no cool, no cocaine. this is also obvious… or so I hope.

third, I’m scruffy, but not too scruffy so it shows to most people that I don’t smoke pot. and my hairs short, so I’m not a hippy, this might all make sense at the end of this post.

or maybe not…

fourth, I don’t drink or smoke. ever. just never saw the appeal of alcohol. so it would be obvious to the thinking world that I don’t dig clubs.

the point, austin of full of drug users and night clubs. and they all love live music and are ready to dig into their drug money to get in to see a lame band play in a too small night club, half-drunk and not putting out a good product. the band, not the addicts, addicts are mostly fun to watch. bands, not so much.

you really shouldn’t carry anything with you

not that I saw a lot of people getting jumped for their bags, but it’s a long fucking walk from a parking space to any where in Austin. unless you live in the warehouse district, and if you do that’s a little lame, you can’t get a close parking space near anything. so I checked into SxSW and got a bag full of ads and magazines, and a dvd(a c. thomas howell movie if you can believe that shit). and it had to weight thirty pounds, the bag was one of those hippy-reusable grocery bag with shit straps. you know the ones that cut into your shoulder when you have a single chic-lit in them.

I hurt, like when I started carrying a sousaphone in high school. deep shoulder hurt.

so really don’t carry anything with you, lock it in you car. car keys and a wallet are the only thing’s you should carry and as far as the crime thing goes just don’t carry cash

I attract drug addicts

so I’m waiting in line to see Sarah Silverman: Jesus is Magic, and I just got out of Dead Birds and got right back in line to see that next movie.

just a side not here, but why does it take the alamo drafthouse a full hour to clean up? hell, Dead Birds had maybe thirty people watching including myself and my bag and it still took them an hour, WTF??

so, I get back in line to see sarah silverman, and I’m usually not very vocal about this, but she it hot and it’s nice to watch a comic and actually enjoy looking at the comic. I got a dvd of henry rollins and it’s much easier to listen to than watch. so I skipped the earlier showing and this was the last showing of any movie at this years SxSW, I saw the first and last showings…

anyway I got in line and immediately an aging hippy cuts me in line, so not being a tree-hugger I tapped him on the shoulder and made me presence know. so after he moved behind me, he starts grousing about the way the festival has been run this year. now this is my first years and I have my own little issues with the run of place, but I know that no one else cares.

the hippy doesn’t know, or doesn’t care. direct quote, ‘why do they let people run this?’

good question, better question is who should run the festival if not people.

‘I don’t know, but people always screw it up…’

I blink and turn away, but in a line you can’t run away.

‘it’s like the government…’

I don’t turn back, I resist.

‘they just start wars…’

okay at this I turn, and I’m not a shill for the man, but really wars came first. governments just made wars bigger. so I turn to the hipster and mention this.

reaction, ‘…’

so the line finally starts to move. I don’t sit next to the hippy in the drafthouse.

so after I saw The Thing About My Folks I got right back in line to see Promedio Rojo, a chilean teen-sex comedy. good movie, fun watch, except that harry knowles wouldn’t stop babbling through-out the film.

so I got in line and this time I’m behind the drug addicts. chain smoking in the line ahead of my. dressed all in purple.

purple long-sleeve tee.

purple jeans… where does a guy get purple jeans.

and a purple bandana, on top of his head.

unless you’re a short effeminate, high pitched guy named prince, you shouldn’t where all purple.

so the drug addict turns to me and says, ‘so what’s this movie about?’

now by this time I’ve been in the line for about ten minutes, and the line was already long by the time I got in it, so this guy must have been waiting at least thirty more minutes in the line than me, because I was it the last person in line because paul rieser can babble like nobody’s business about himself. I don’t like to stand in line for more than twenty minutes for something I’m know about, this guy didn’t even know what it was about.

so I pulled out my giant SxSW book and showed him the description, because although I saw the trailer I really had no other way to describe the movie than chilean teen-sex comedy. now after seeing it I would say American Pie in Spanish, only good.

I also mention this guy because he had a platinum badge, meaning he could see anything movie or music or interactive. I just got the movie badge and I don’t think I could have done anything more than see the movies and this guys spend $600 on a platinum badge, just a waste.

police and red lights

so over the course of nine days I never saw any cops stopped at any red lights, and I also heard more sirens than at any other time in my life. I might be a little naïve but it might be nice if the cops led by example and stopped at red once in a while.

adult recreational services inc.

as with everything hookers are easy to spot. I parked at a parking garage at 4th and red river, and if you know anything about austin, the alamo drafthouse is on 3rd and colorado so this was about a eight block walk from my car and the movie. so I went to seven nights of movie five in downtown Austin, so during the course of these five nights I’m solicited every night by these same half dozen hookers.

I abstain for two reasons: I’m a pussy, I’ll admit this right here. and I don’t carry cash, ever. I had $7 bucks for parking and my bank card. now I’m not sure if the hookers would have taken my bank card, but I know that I don’t need that showing up on my bank statement. adult recreational services inc.

pregnant woman and clubs

so after I pass the hookers last night notice a line for one of the many clubs in austin and at the end of the line there is this pregnant woman, a good seven to eight months pregnant, in a skin tight leopard print dress cigarette in between two fingers babbling on a cell phone.

now this was 1:30 am, and I’m feeling ragged, this chick is uber-pregnant and trying to get into the club at this time.

do you want some incense for a buck?

so after I spot the pregnant woman I’m still heading to my car and I pass the raging party at the o’henry house and I cross this unmark street to the hilton near the convention center, and I guy says, ‘hey man, what street is this?’

I back up and check out the street signs, nothing. and I’ve been walking the streets of austin for a few days, but I just don’t know the streets, so I say I don’t know. and this is where the conversation goes off on an odd, at least for me, tangent.

‘wanna buy some incense for a buck?’

naw dude I’m good

‘how ‘bout a dime bag?’

I’m good… and I just have this strange vision of where this conversation is headed

‘how about some horse tranquilizers?’

thankfully I start walking away before it got that far.

‘I’ll be here dude…’

parking level three

so my parking garage was right there and normally I park on the second level and take the stairs up to my car and head home, but this last night I had to park on the third level and I work on the third floor of an office building and monday through friday I take the stairs. they’re closer to my desk and I can use the exercise.

but this was 1:40 in the morning, and as I’ve said before I’m a pussy, so I took the elevator, that is why is it there.

so I get on the elevator with a few other people a couple of guys and a couple of girls. the walls of this elevator are covered with dusty foot prints all the way up to the ceiling and the light fixture and as far as I can tell all the foot prints are right foot prints I could only make out a couple of left shoes. as I said I’m a pussy, but the guys were just a little bit more so than I as they got off on the second level and I could have mounted the stairs to the second level in the amount of time I waited for the elevator, so it wasn’t everest or anything.

and the girls were slightly less a couple of pussies than me because they were parked on the fourth level, so I guys that’s a little bit of irony.

then I drove home and fell asleep for ten hours

fin

there is no tyranny so despotic as that of public opinion among a free people

no real connection between tonight quote and the rest of the blog, I just like pissing on the idea of majority rule

mexican horror, chilean teen-sex comedies, hong kong action/comedies, and crispin glover…

what does all that mean?

why, SxSW of course. this year I’m dropping $300 on a film registration and I’m cutting to the head of the line. I’ve lined up twenty films over the course of nine days and I’m still stuck working the full week at my day job. sleep will just be a memory come next Saturday.

check out my daily, as much as a full work schedule and nightly movies will allow, reports from the best that sundance rejected.

==> www.alifelessomovies.blogspot.com <==

jebus wept

super geek

I must push this link. wilwheaton.net

I’ll admit I hated the crusher as a child watching ST:TNG, but it’s a little cool to see that his website and blog don’t suck ass. check it out for a laugh and for the soft-core porn links, I shit you not there are porn links on Wesley Crusher’s website.

hell, I’m thinking of buying a william fucking shatner t-shirt from his store, and that’s not the weirdest thing there.

good times.

on second thought, let’s not go there… it’s a silly place

well turns out there might actually be a reason to visit nyc. The Holy Grail is a great movie, but I’m interested in seeing what kind of musical it would make.

über-étrange

so I was hitting all the normal lurking spots and I came across this disturbing link on Holbrook’s blog.

my answer: jebus hates, jebus hates me, jebus hates you, jebus hates everything you and I love.

ex. george W. bush
ex. the holocaust
ex. republicans
ex. the crusades
ex. karl rove

if there was any love in jebus’ heart he would smite these people and the people that cased these horrors.

there is also one other thing: HE’S DEAD! and has been dead for pretty damn close to 2000 years, and he isn’t coming back, ever.

god is a figment of the tortured imaginations of small creatures that needed something, anything to fight away the thunder.

it’s plato and the cave time people, time to step into the light.

fuck baby jebus.

brutal

so on to other things, right now I’m watching the hack-job Spike has made of The Hunt For Red October. more than just the fullframe and the language edits, they’ve ripped out scenes at random, character background stories, and most of the really good lines. this is worse than a prime time version of Deep Throat on PAX.

for shame Spike.

the only saving grace is debbie gibson every few minutes before the commercials.

danger... danger... danger will robinson

blog at your own risk

I stumbled upon this story this morning after taking the longest call of my life. now I was never temped to post anything about the call except the length: one hour, eight minutes and fifty-nine seconds.

I’m so gonna get slammed on my quality for that one, but I can’t hang up on a caller unless they curse after I warn them. and this caller was polite.

so I’m fucked.

but, as I was saying, people shouldn’t post about their jobs in easily identifiable ways. I love reading Holbrook’s blog, but I can never put the kind of detail into my posts that he does. I actually have laws that limit my detail, and the electronic usage agreement I’m bound by.

in the end, if you wouldn’t email it or print it in a newspaper, don’t talk about your job in your blog.

but Holbrook, you may continue.

publish and be damned

misanthrope

yesterday, as I was lurking around the web, I fell upon webster’s online dictionary, and the word of the day was misanthrope: a person who hates or distrusts humankind.

I believe that as I grow older I am becoming more and more misanthropic. I drive down the road and the see the ‘W’ like black and white swastikas everywhere. the calls I take at work, from people the republicans have stripped of all social benefits, are filled with the culture of entitlement. and a deep, sickening racism, ‘I want a doctor with an american name... they don’t speak no english…’

ignorance has given way to stupidity. the taint of republicanism woven into the very words coming from the social bottom. before the republicans took over texas we could boast that a texan president signed the social security act of 1965. now we have fewer benefits for our poor than louisiana or arkansas.

I have a distain of this species

teen jailed for zombie terror

well I picked up this story a couple of days ago, and in a rare pause, I have waited to post about it. like most things the surface is very thin on this one, and the opposing opinions are remarkably well matched.

for good or for bad, I’m not going to take a side. but I do feel that $5000 is too much for the bail for this kid, if his grandparents were the ones who turned him in, I doubt anyone would be willing to raise a hundred bucks for the dumb-cluck.

then again this is kentucky.

more reasons to hate the french

as if we really needed more, the french have shown they know just as little about common decency as the rest of the world. what amountes to the lower economic half of the town of angers has been arrested for sexually assaulting their own children and selling those same children into prostitution. apparently the age of enlightenment skipped angers

divorce iranian style

as I’m not a fundamentalist anything, I can’t really say how the judges will rule on this one, but I say she has a really good case. I can’t stand how I smell after more than one night, and I live in an air condition first-world country with real laws and clean water, an epidemic of food and a $12 dollar an hour job. so I can only image the retched stench of this man that lives in iran and has given up the simple benefit of bathing.

god help her, set that poor woman free.

bus driver killed en route

more evidence in the case of tennessee vs. the think world, a teen has been accused of shooting his bus driver. and the kicker is he chose to shoot her while the bus was moving, all because she turned the mental light-weight in for chewing tobacco on the bus to school.

and on the day after the supreme court decides juvenile executions are no longer constitutional.

so the evidence now stands at:
causing Texans more work with online forms… tn before tx
Leslie Ballin’s ‘jury pool from hell’
senator fred dalton thompson
and now teen kill bus driver over chewing tobaco

how am I not myself

infinity and nothingness

tonight I began watching I heart Huckabees, I write this because I started the movie late and it’s still playing.

what I have gleaned from this little jaunt through the modern philosophical interpretations it that I earned my ‘A’ in philosophy. I managed to follow the mishmash of platonic and eastern ideas.

the important thing to remember is that: you are nothing and everything.

physically we are all connect through base particles, but meta-physically we are separated by the chains we forge in life. as we progress to the 'omega point' physically we break down the base particles and push forward to the perfect state of being: as far as I can tell, a cat. meta-physically we only pile on more chains. so infinity and nothingness do coexist… in completely separate houses, three counties apart.

the world works because people do not ask the big stupid questions.

why are we here? to go forth and multiply.

what is the meaning of it all? to question the meaning of it all.

is there life on other planets? is there truely life on this planet?

what would brian botano do? he’d kick an ass or two, that’s what brian botano'd do.

the big questions already have answers, we just can’t fully deal with the simplicity of the answers. it’s the little questions that we think we can answer, but have no idea what are the real answers.

take an minute to ponder the answer to this: why is nine times six, forty-two?

personally, I think it has something to do with quantum.